My mind keeps wandering
to places with safety signals,
to places where others have fallen
to places where white flowers rest
upon dead bodies.
My mind keeps asking me the same questions,
of when it will get better,
of when I will find the right words,
of when we will buy white flowers,
of when white flowers will be bought for us.
My mind keeps crying,
at night, when my body is too tired of staying awake,
at night, when my soul has been drenched in sorrow,
at night, when my heart beats too loud within this empty house.
My mind keeps complaining
about the flowers I forgot to water
and the dishes that still wait in the sink,
about the clothes I had to wash
and the room that has become a mess.
My mind keeps talking
to the body which crawls out of bed in the morning,
to the swollen eyes underneath the make-up,
to the shaking hands that hold coffee-cups.
My mind keeps invading
my capacity to think,
so, today I bought white roses,
and placed them within my mind.
Suddenly, it became silent, all around.